Summer is quickly approaching and if you have a little one, it’s already summer schedule in your home. It’s heating up and work slows down a little in the summer, but things still need to get done. The days are longer and life doesn’t stop. Those dog days of summer are real. If you’re anything like me, you get burned out pretty easily. Life is so needy that the littlest things can overwhelm us and cause us stress. I am in that constant phrasing to my family of “I need a vacation”. But even with the vacation comes stress, planning, packing, the laundry when I return, and all just to get back to regular life and the busyness of it. Nothing (time included) stops when we need it to. So how do we handle life, our mindset and stressful situations (work, home, balancing etc.) WITHOUT the burnout?
I was in therapy yesterday and we dove right into this topic. My therapist can sense when I am overwhelmed with things and sees it written all over my face. Or in my hands, I like to fidget my hands when I am overwhelmed. So we went over some techniques, some of which I am doing already, some I am not but want to implement. There are 7 good strategies to preventing burnout.
1. Setting boundaries between work and personal life. I don’t think this is exclusive to burnout because setting boundaries is healthy in all sorts of situations; But boundaries when it comes to burnout is definitely necessary. Let’s talk about work for example. If you are in a position where you are working overtime and not seeing your family a lot due to long work hours, stressed out about a big project or managing several projects all at once, you don’t want another thing added to your plate. It’s perfectly ok to set boundaries and put other and newer things on the back burner as they arise so you can get the priorities done and over with…then tackle the new items. You are only human. Sometimes our bosses forget that. It’s also more than ok to say (kindly) “I just don’t have the time right now.
2. Prioritizing Self-Care is a big one. One we can all use more of and it’s not selfish. Robin McGraw, wife of Dr. Phil McGraw, says all the time, “You can’t pour from an empty cup”, so it’s important to take care of number one. On airplanes, we put our mask on before helping those around us – think of your self-care routine as your oxygen mask. Whether it’s sleep, physical activity, nutrition or even seeing friends socially, it’s important to have that “me” time so you can fuel up for your loved ones. Once you have filled your cup, it’s easier and more fun to take care of others. This is not an excuse to be lazy or procrastinate doing what you need to do, however. This is a priority in your own right but needs to be done with care.
3. Practice mindfulness and relaxation techniques. As I was typing this, I thought to myself, “Self, you’ve posted this item before.” and yes, I have. Relaxation and mindfulness while similar to ‘me time’ can be considered that, but I want to focus on the true meaning of these two words. There are so many wonderful and effective mindfulness apps these days and I highly recommend downloading one and finding your own personal time where you can be mindful of yourself, of situations, and of others. I like taking my quiet and mindful time right after the shower at night, before I get ready for bed. I’ve just washed off the day and now it’s time to get centered.
4. Cultivate hobbies and interests. When I started my journey down this beautiful path I am on, I started relieving my anxiety with one of those diamond paintings? You put little, tiny, teeny jewels on a piece of sticky fabric and the colors create a picture. Almost like color-by-number. At first I thought that was going to be the biggest frustration for me and send me over the edge, however in reality, it became a great hobby and stress reliever. I would get so enthralled in what I was doing everything else faded away. Now, personally, I don’t like those diamond paintings, but the one I did fit the theme of my office at home, so I kept it. Do I want to do 23987 of them? No. I have gotten back into working out, working on my inner self as far as strength goes, because it is my personal belief that the stronger we are on the inside, the stronger we can be for the world. Working out creates endorphins. Vitamins create cell reproduction in hair, bones, organs and your whole body, so I take vitamins too. Creating a routine that you can stick to (and not get burned out on!) is a way to build strength and dedication to yourself! What a great gift you can give. Interests are the same way. Personally, I am so proud of myself for making a decision to go back to school and get my Masters in Psychology with an emphasis in Forensics. This combines my passion and my biggest interest! As I mentioned in a prior blog, that was my biggest regret… changing my major in college. Now I am taking the necessary steps to make up for that and pursue an interest! It’s literally given me new life.
5. Take breaks and disconnect. I find it so strange that for me, I get JUST as easily exhausted and done with peopling on a slow day at work than a day that’s super busy. Whether we are stimulated by work or not, our eyes can and often do get overstimulated. I work in an office out of my home (hopefully that will change soon) and it’s beyond quiet in here. I have told them I wish we could pipe in some music or something but yet to no avail. Doing anything (even trying to fall asleep) in dead silence bothers me and makes me anxious. So I have my phone next to me and I watch shows during the day as I work. A lot of times, if I don’t get up several times throughout the day and physically step outside or just walk around for a brain-break, I can quickly lose it on my way home. If I don’t change what’s on my phone throughout the day, I tune it out and then it’s like I’m working in silence which, as mentioned above, creates anxiety. Whether or not these issues speak to you, taking breaks throughout the day and disconnecting can help burnout and that mental exhaustion where you just want to curl up in a ball in a dark room at the end of the day. The summer is a wonderful time to hang with family and friends at the lake, the pool, or the beach once the necessities of the work day get met. Don’t burnout before you can enjoy these extra hours of daylight with the ones that mean the most to you!
*Before continuing, it’s important to note that these items, while important need to be prioritized with other things going on and in small doses. Too much burnout recovery can cause laziness, so time management is important.
6. Delegate responsibilities. This one is a major one in our household. Now that my son is almost 9 (and his big passion is working out), he helps a lot more around the house. He’s always been good at that, but he has taken over some of my chores, which I can’t lie, is great! They are not large responsibilities of course, but small items like, bringing in the bags of groceries from the car, for instance. Same with office life. Leading committees, or being in charge of a big team project can get exhausting and somehow, we always end up doing all the work, don’t we? D-E-L-E-G-A-T-E. It’s hard for me to do this also, but once I learned the power of the word ‘NO’ and began delegating tasks that yes, I could do but it would be better for my mental health if someone else took that off my plate, my god the work world changed 180 degrees for the better. Even if it’s just one little thing taken off your plate each day or week, that will give you 5-15 mins back in your day to take a break and disconnect, spend 5 mins playing a game on your phone, practice mindfulness and relaxation etc.
7. Lastly, seek support. This ties in all the ideas above, but really, finding someone to talk to, whether its a spouse, a family member, a counselor, a priest etc., can be the true catalyst of change when it comes to burnout. Many of the things we keep on our plate throughout the day never get done and we internalize that frustration with not accomplishing our tasks. Speaking about burnout and your emotional state will get it out of your head and unlock that door where you keep it all buried in darkness. Speak about it. Bring it to the light and you will see either the person you are speaking with can help you finish those tasks, will give you ideas on how to accomplish them without stressing, or just be there to support your daily journey. It’s almost like journaling… once we write it down and get it out of our mind, it helps clear the pathways between the pieces of our brain. It’s the same thing with talking. Seek support and allow help to enter your sphere. It really can make a big difference.
I know this was a long post, and in reality, I have been working on it for some time. I don’t think it’s necessary or possible to do every single one of the 7 items above on a daily basis, we would never get anything done. But focus on the one or two items that speak to you the most and work on those at first. Then switch it up and focus on one or two more and so on. My hope is to enjoy the summer a little more and get that ease back in my day, and I hope that for you too!
XOXO,
Juls
The goal of these blogs is to set intentions and to manifest a beautiful and purposeful life! To find beauty in the ugliest of places and to find light in the darkest.
Come with me on this journey as we discover a pathway to healing, health, purpose and joy!
And remember: Don’t take life too seriously, no one gets out alive!
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